Have you ever been to the South? Right. I'm sure you may have traveled below the Mason Dixon line for a vacation, to see some relatives, or for whatever reason. Maybe I should reword the question, Have you ever lived in the South? Living in the Union my entire life until recently, I can safely attest that the South is a ridiculous place. Let's take a look at the evidence.


Nascar-favorite sport of Southern folk


Nascar was born out of the Prohibition by moonshiners. Moonshiners-people who illegally distill alcohol, carry a banjo (on the knee), keep a shotgun leaning against the porch, and founded Nascar. Moonshiners would drive their liquor from the distillery to where it was sold. Cops catching on, would chase moonshiners, creating a race between cop and moonshiner. Before long, moonshiners were modifying their cars so they could outrun the cops and deliver their precious elixirs to the speakeasies of the day. One day Bob the moonshiner challenged George the moonshiner to a race in their modified cars. Eventually, moonshiners would outrun cops during the week, and race each other on the weekend. This is the sport worshiped in the South, maybe they are just glad they got their whiskey.




Fashion
In the South it is cool to wear crokies. You know how old people wear their glasses around their neck, so they don't lose them? Well in the South, its cool to wear your sunglasses on these things called crokies, which fulfill the same purpose.